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22 Ekim 2007 Pazartesi

Days of Pollyanna

The first rain of the summer is finally in Istanbul. It has been a hot summer, and although I am a summer person, I missed seeing the hues of grey. I love colours in my own paintings, and I am not a fan of the colour grey. However, I missed it. I really missed seeing the city and the Bosphorus under the shades of grey. It is as if the city is cooling after the extra hot days and nights.

We tend to associate fall with sadness, as if it is the end of something good. In high school it meant the end of the summer vacation, yet also meant coming together with friends at school. Today, when I realized that the sun was covered with the clouds and it was about to start raining, I was truly happy. I caught myself smiling as I watched the captain and the crew of the boats tied alongside the Bosphorus carry the seat cushions of the boats inside. A cool day was on its way and I was really happy.

***

I like to smile. I do. It makes me feel good and I like expressing it when I am feeling good. Yet, I realize that we in Turkey do not do that much. When you ask a friend how he or she is, the reply usually is “I am ok” at best. You rarely hear some of say “I am happy today” or “I am feeling very well today”. It is as if we are afraid that if we talk about it, we will scare it off. The truth is on the contrary.

Happiness and joy create the rich soil that our dreams need to grow. We need the happiness to make the impossible possible. It does not work the other way around. We cannot wait to be happy only when something happens the way we desire. We need to be happy no matter what. That is the only answer to our problems. And to call happiness into our lives, we need to think about it, talk about it, express it and invite it into our lives.

When I was a kid, there was the story of “Pollyanna”. That was as close as we got to positive thinking. And “you are playing to be Pollyanna” was a phrase frequently used when one was too optimistic or positive under negative circumstances, and the comment did not have a positive connotation. Being optimistic when difficult was considered being too naïve.

Why is then we are so afraid of being happy? What is wrong with being hopeful under dire circumstances? Why are we so intolerant of optimism? When we talk about our pain and suffering, most people agree to let us feel that way. Yet, when we choose to be hopeful in difficulties, friends and family cannot speak enough of the negative possibilities.

You might have seen in your life as I have that – when we want something with a strong positive desire and belief, we get it. And if I worry about something too much, bingo, that also comes out into life. For years and years, healers and teachers and now almost every self-help book tell about the amazing results of positive thinking and living. I keep writing about such books and materials every week. Check out the old articles and you will find all kinds of information.

Still so many people resist even to smile. Are you aware that every time you are angry and worried you are making your condition and health worse? Could it be not possible to try for one day to see how it feels to be positive no matter what? We say that we are afraid to fail, yet the real fear seems to be the fear of achieving our heart’s desires, and the fear of being happy and successful. We are taking every measure to make sure hat we do not succeed.

It is time to wake up. It really is. It is not the days that are passing by. It is our life, with all of the opportunities and experiences waiting for us. What if for a week, for a day, you chose to follow my recommendation like a bitter medicine we take so many times. Would you agree to try it for a change?

You may ask what the rules of the game are. Well, I cannot say there are any rules, but I can tell you what I find works for me.

When I wake up in the morning, I look in the mirror and smile to myself and to the people in my family. I say that I love myself and that I am grateful to be alive that day.
I try everything to be in a happy and joyful mood. I keep away from TV and newspapers if I cannot control myself not to read and watch the negative news.
If I find it hard to feel happy, I smile and pretend to be happy as if I am an actor in a play. When I physically act happy, my feelings always match in a very short time.
When I feel like worrying, I take an action in diminish that worry.
I listen to positive uplifting music. Watch out for the words of the songs you are listening to. Whether you believe it or not, those words do reach your subconscious.
Before starting to talk about something bad and negative, I count to 10 quietly. Do we really need to seal a bad event by our words? The more we talk of something, the more we anchor it. Why not use the power of words to support our wishes?
When I am feeling angry, I take a deep breath and let go of the feeling. Anger will only make us weaker energetically. We may experience a certain rush of strength for a short period, but it will only be for a short period. Anger is the emotion responsible for many of our physical diseases.

Try the methods that you know or the ones I have shared shortly to keep yourself as much happy and joyful as you can for a day or a week. It is your choice. If you would like, write your experiences in a journal. It is much easier to control our emotions when we are aware of the negative feelings and thoughts that we go through during the day.

***

Every week, I write about many methods that we can use to improve the quality of our lives. There are many different techniques and methods. All are beneficial when properly used. However, unless we are committed to live our life to its best possible potential, unless we decide to live the happiest, healthiest and most abundant life that we can, tools cannot make it happen for us. When we make the decision, it is much easy to get the help needed.

This week or when ever you feel like it, though sooner is always better, please decide to live a healthy, happy, joyful, and abundant life. If you are not able to let go of your negative beliefs and feelings, put them on a shelf for a while. For a week, for a day, for as long or as short as you like. And see the results for yourself. That is my request from you, and my suggested remedy for the week.

Wish you lots of love and luck.
Z

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Affirmation of the Week:
“I accept perfect health now.”
By Louise L. Hay
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Quote of the Week:
“What we need is more people who specialize in the impossible.”
Theodore Roethke
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Suggested Reading:
“Mutant Message Down Under” By Marlo Morgan
The Turkish translation of this book is available under the name “Bir Çift Yürek.”
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